Are you stuck with a phobia?
Written by Margaret Munoz
The anxious voice at the end of the phone told me she was 38, pregnant, had a phobia to needles, and while her doctor was desperate for her to have a blood test, she couldn’t even set foot in the medical centre. “ No problem,” I thought, and asked her when she needed to have the blood test. “Tomorrow,” she replied. Well, no pressure there!
As we started to work it became apparent that this phobia was very severe and had been there since she was three, and had surfaced several times since, but she had then managed to avoid needles and blood tests for a long time, until this need arose. She had made one attempt to have the blood taken and had fled. She was terrified that she would ‘freak out’ again, panic, want to run, and be crying and hysterical or faint as she had in the past. Talking about it made her feel sick, with tightness in her chest and difficulty breathing.
We tapped on her symptoms, on her memories and on every step of the procedure she would be taking the next day. We did a lot of tapping! As all the anxiety and symptoms began to dissipate she became aware of another fear – that of letting the phobia go. She suddenly exclaimed, “I don’t think I want to let go of this phobia!” This interesting phenomenon was due to the protection that was being afforded by the phobia, i.e., if she didn’t have the phobia any more it would mean she would have to have the blood test. Her adult rational self knew that you don’t die as a result of having a needle in your arm for a few minutes, but underneath lay an unconscious fear of dying. So not a good idea to have a blood test!
I have observed that people with phobias seem noticeably reluctant to address them. I’m sure that there is this longing to be free of it, but at the same time they are ruled by a fear of the feelings they will have to suffer in order to address it, as well as the unconscious fear of not being safe in some way if the phobia isn’t there to protect them.
I suggest that if you are suffering from a phobia you might want to start tapping on your fear of letting go of the phobia first, before actually tackling the phobia. There needs to be a real emphasis on safety – and I think it is good to affirm making positive choices. You could use a set-up statement such as,
Even though I don’t feel safe enough to let go of my fear, I choose to know I’m always safe within myself.
And then tap through other resistances:
Even though this phobia is too hard to get over, I choose to allow it to be easy
Even though I’m afraid to get over this phobia, I’m ready to get over it completely
Even though I’m critical of this phobia, I choose to acknowledge its role in protecting me
Even though I’ve had this phobia for so long, I’m willing to change
I then like to tap with people on what I call “the bottom line fear”- the fear of dying. Even if you absolutely don’t think that you have a fear of dying in relation to the phobia you have, I suggest you tap on it anyway because my experience is that it can create a really big shift.
Even though I’m afraid of dying, I choose to love and accept myself and all my fears
Even though I’m afraid I’ll die if I let go of my phobia, I choose to know that isn’t true
You can also tap rounds while affirming:
I’m ready to let go of this phobia
I’m willing to release this phobia
It’s time to go free from this phobia
I allow myself to release this phobia
You may find that there is now a much firmer foundation from which to tackle the specific fears and symptoms that are involved in your phobia.
And yes, the pregnant lady got her blood test and, better still, was able to go for subsequent tests, managing to have 9 vials of blood taken and survive a nurse who had trouble finding a vein! It is really worth tackling a phobia for the amount of freedom that then becomes available to you.
