I often do interviews talking about The Tapping Solution App and Tapping in general, and one of the ideas I share is how Tapping takes 5 minutes to learn and a lifetime to master. (This principle can be applied to most things in life!)
Tapping is surprisingly simple to learn. Even kids can pick it up quickly. But to get the best results, to be able to use it effectively for yourself and the ones you love, you have to keep studying, exploring, and using it.
That being said, here are the top 5 mistakes I see people make regarding Tapping.
Mistake #1 – Not Using It!
Ok, ok, I know this seems a little obvious… haha. But it’s a serious issue and one I’m sure you’ve faced. How often have you looked back on an event, or a day, or a physical problem you had for a while and thought, “Why didn’t I tap on that?”
I know I’ve spent half a day with a sore neck from sleeping wrong before I thought, “Duh! Tap on it!” And I’m supposed to be The Tapping Guy – how could I forget? 🙂
If you are unsure about what Tapping can help with, here’s a short list.
The reality is that this Tapping thing is relatively new for all of us. I’ve been using it, studying it, teaching about it for the past 10 years or so. But for the previous 25 years, I didn’t know about it, didn’t use it, had no experience of it. That’s A LOT of years of conditioning without having this tool, especially in the most formative years of childhood.
We simply haven’t had it as part of our lives, so we’ve developed habits that don’t include it. If you were taught how to tap as a child and were instructed that it was just as important (or more!) as brushing your teeth, you’d have a different experience now.
So the most basic reason most of us don’t use it is that we simply forget. Now, there can also be deeper issues for not using it, such as self-sabotage, reversals, fear of change, and so forth. I’ll be covering those separately in future posts. But for now, it’s important to just recognize that when you don’t use it, it’s often simply because you don’t think of it – and to gently, and kindly remind yourself to USE IT! 🙂
Here’s a little Tapping script to clear some of that resistance and those old habits. Try it now and see how it affects your week.
Karate Chop: Even though I haven’t been using Tapping as much as I could, I deeply and completely accept myself.
Karate Chop: Even though I could have made my life easier by using Tapping on (fill in the blank of a recent time when you might have used it), I choose to relax and forgive myself now.
Karate Chop: Even though I’m not used to turning to Tapping to solve my problems, I choose to start using it. I choose to become more resourceful, and to remember to use this powerful tool!
Eyebrow: I haven’t been tapping
Side of the Eye: Why not?
Under the Eye: Am I sabotaging myself?
Under the Nose: Maybe…
Under the Mouth: Or maybe I just forgot
Collarbone: Maybe I’m just not used to doing this
Under the Arm: But I can start using it now
Top of the Head: I’m tapping now!
Eyebrow: And that’s great
Side of the Eye: I choose to remember
Under the Eye: To tap!
Under the Nose: I choose to develop this positive habit
Under the Mouth: That can help me so much
Collarbone: It will make my life easier
Under the Arm: And that’s a choice I want to make
Top of the Head: I choose to tap when I most need it
Take a deep breath…
And let it go… Repeat a few times, or focus in on anything that came up while doing those short rounds.
Ok, now on to…
Mistake #2 – Not Being Specific Enough
I always encourage people to start with global statements because it’s usually the easiest language to start with, and it can get things going in the right direction. What do I mean by a global statement? Something general like:
“Even though I’m not happy right now… I deeply and completely accept myself.”
That statement is global because it’s broad, and doesn’t focus on specifics.
From there, though, after a round or two of the global statement, it’s important to hone in on the specifics.
So in this case, you might go from, “Even though I’m not happy right now…” as the first statement, to “Even though I’m not happy right now because my boss was such a jerk today…”
Now you’ve focused on a specific event, which will get you better results. The more specific you can get, the better. Which leads us to Mistake #3…
Mistake #3 – Not Addressing All “Aspects” of the Problem
Gary Craig, the founder of EFT, was a genius at identifying the importance of “aspects” to getting great results. What’s meant by aspects? An aspect is a specific “part” of the issue.
So in the case above, “Not being happy” – we go from the general to the specific, “I’m not happy because my boss was such a jerk”, to even more specific “aspects”.
So here are some potential aspects in this example:
“I’m not happy because my boss yelled at me.” (This is an “audible” aspect of the event)
“I don’t like the way he looked at me.” (This is an aspect of the experience, the “visual cue”)
“I felt his words hit me in the pit of my stomach.” (Here’s a “body sensation” to address)
“I’m worried he’s going to fire me.” (A “future fear” to address)
“It reminds me of the way my father used to talk to me.” (A “childhood trauma” to address)
“I never have good relationships with my bosses.” (A “limiting belief/past experience” to address)
And we could go on and on!
Now, sometimes issues can be handled with global tapping, but the great thing about working through aspects is that you’ll likely uncover so much more stuff that’s going on in your life. And clearing this particular experience with your boss can have massive repercussions on a bunch of other things!
For example, you start with the experience with your boss. But then you tap on how your father used to talk to you, and you heal that relationship problem and have a better (and less reactive) experience with your boss.
If you take the time to do it right, it can have profound effects that last a lifetime.
Which leads perfectly into Mistake #4…
Mistake #4 – Not Tapping for Long Enough
This is a mistake I see A LOT of people make. They’ll say, “Yeah, I tried tapping on that, didn’t work.” And when I ask them how long they tapped on the issue, they say a couple of minutes, or a round or two! That’s rarely enough.
I see this in particular with physical pain. “Oh, my neck hurt so I tapped on it but it didn’t go away…”
“How long did you tap?”
“Two or three minutes.”
🙂
The 1-minute miracles DO happen, but more often than not, it takes some more sustained tapping.
I’m not saying that you have to spend hours doing it, but you really want to give it at least 15 minutes of sustained tapping to work through an issue properly.
My trick when I go to tap on something is to set a timer or some sort of alarm, and I promise myself I won’t stop until the 15 minutes are up. This prevents me from giving up quickly, being distracted, and so forth.
Or can also download The Tapping Solution App and explore the many guided meditations in there. Then you won’t have to time yourself at all – simply listen and tap along!
And finally…
Mistake #5 – Not Writing Down What You’re Working On
If you’re working by yourself, I find it really helpful to have a pen and paper (or the computer) handy to take notes on what you want to work on, or to write down your progress on the 1-10 scale, or to record other things that come up while tapping.
The last item might be the most important – writing down other things that come up.
So here’s what this might look like. You write down:
“I’m frustrated with all the bills I got in the mail today. It’s a 7 on the 0-10 scale.”
You start tapping, the frustration goes down. But all of a sudden, some anger comes up. You write that down.
“I’m angry at myself for not working harder this month. It’s an 8.”
You tap on that. That eases and turns to sadness.
“I’m sad that this keeps happening. It’s a 5.”
You tap on that.
You check back in on the frustration you wrote about above. That’s a 1, you barely feel it.
The anger moved to a 4. There’s still something there, you tap on that further.
While doing that tapping, you think of two events from your childhood.
“That time that my father said I’d never amount to anything.”
“My mother crying because we didn’t have enough money.”
You write down both events because you know that you want to address each separately.
And so forth…
It is truly like peeling an onion. And while it might seem complicated at first, once you get the hang of it, it’s easy. And it becomes even easier when you write stuff down and stay on track.
The other nice thing about writing things down is that if you’re not ready to tackle something right then, or don’t have the time to, you have it written down to go back to later.
Well, there you have it! The top 5 mistakes I see people make with EFT – and how to solve them!
Until next time…
Keep Tapping!
Nick Ortner
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